Dear MAILER-DAEMON

I admin almost a dozen email servers across the country, and I wonder if anyone else gets some funny replies to mailer-daemon messages. Because I use qmail, a non deliverable message looks something like this:

Hi. This is the qmail-send program at somedomain.com.
I’m afraid I wasn’t able to deliver your message to the following addresses. This is a permanent error; I’ve given up. Sorry it didn’t work out.

…and then some relevant error as to why the message could not be delivered.

These are a few of the replies i’ve seen recently from customers:

Don’t give up!!!

you can’t because that’s my friend

(That one was in response to a error that said “222.222.222.222 does not like recipient”)

and finally,

leave me alone jerk